Mindfulness Quote of the Day

“Walk as if you are kissing the Earth with your feet.”-Thich Nhat Hanh

Mindful Eating for the New Year

I imagine many of you have eaten a raisin.  But how many of you have eaten a raisin mindfully?  A growing body of research shows that eating mindfully could help to make healthy food decisions and to lose weight.  Eating mindfully means eating slowly, without distractions, and focusing on the food with all of your senses.  So many of us, myself included, scarf down dinner while texting a friend, watching tv, and checking email all at the same time.  When doing so, we certainly don't concentrate on the taste or texture of our food.  We do this at the expense of really tasting our food and likely end up over-indulging.

The next time you sit down to a meal, I challenge you to taste at least one food mindfully and engage all of your senses. Turn off the tv, put the phone on vibrate, and try the following exercise, with a raisin or any other food:

Pick up a raisin and hold it in the palm of your hand. Look at it. Examine it. Describe the raisin. What does it look like? What color is it? How would you describe the texture? Now, feel the raisin in the palm of your hand. What does it feel like against your skin? Pick it up with your other hand. What does it feel like in your fingers? Is it slimy? Rough? Smooth? Soft? Hard? Squeeze it softly. What do you feel? Smell the raisin. Describe how it smells. Rub the raisin between your fingers next to your ear.  What does the raisin sound like?  Put the raisin in your mouth, but do not eat it. What does it feel like on your tongue? What does the texture feel like now? How does it taste? How does the taste compare to the way it smelled? Move it around in your mouth and notice every aspect of the raisin. Bite the raisin once and notice what you taste. Now how does the raisin feel in your mouth? Slowly finish chewing the raisin and notice its texture and how it tastes.  Does it taste like other raisins you have eaten? Or does it taste differently?  Before you swallow, see if you can become aware of the urge to swallow.  Then swallow.  Notice that you are now exactly one raisin heavier than you were before.

For further reading on mindful eating, check out the following:

NY Times Article on Mindful Eating
Harvard Health Newsletter Article

Coping Ahead for the Holidays

By Elizabeth Gellman, Psy.D.

For many of us, this time of year presents as a dialectic. A dialectic teaches us that two things that seem like opposites can both be true; while the holiday season may be a time of joy, celebration, and getting together with loved ones, it can also bring about intense emotions and experiences.  In order to be most prepared for these situations, we can practice the DBT skill of Coping Ahead. The Coping Ahead skill is part of the emotion regulation module of DBT and it is used to help us build our "emotional cushion" to reduce our vulnerability to intense emotions.  We can cope ahead by anticipating which situations may be difficult and preparing what we will say or how we will act in these moments to manage our emotions most effectively.  Coping ahead works best when we rehearse our plan over and over or imagine the exact steps we will take or DBT skills we will use in upcoming situations.

Here are some ways to Cope Ahead for this holiday season:

1. Recognize which situations may trigger intense emotions. These may be situations that occur year after year or new circumstances that you are anticipating for the first time (i.e., first holiday after the loss of a loved one).  Be mindful of your emotions and allow yourself to experience emotions as they come, without judgment.

2. Plan Ahead. Create a schedule and budget for yourself when doing holiday shopping or prepping for events.  Create a meal plan before holiday parties so that you do not regret your choices or become filled with guilt.  Prepare how you may answer all the "wrong" questions asked by various family members.  Schedule activities for yourself, volunteer, or obtain support if this is a time when you may feel lonely.

3. Engage in pleasant and relaxing activities outside of planning and attending holiday celebrations.  Make time for yourself.  Plan soothing and relaxing activities following what you anticipate may be a stressful event. 

4. Engage in self-care. Focus on caring for yourself by using the DBT PLEASE Skill. The PLEASE skill helps reduce our emotional vulnerability by making sure we treat PhysicaL illness, balance Eating, Avoid mood altering drugs, balance Sleep, and get Exercise.

5. Let go of expectations and fully participate. Accept that the holidays may bring up emotions of anger, sadness, joy, and loneliness.  Accept that family members are who they are and we cannot control what they say or do.  Engage in holiday activities and conversations without expectation or judgment.  Be in the present moment. 

Remember, these are just some ways to plan ahead for the holidays.  We encourage you to come up with additional ways to cope ahead that will be most effective for you.  We wish everyone a safe and healthy holiday and new year!

NY Times Article on Self-Soothing

Click here to read a recent article in the New York Times about research on loneliness and self soothing.  We teach self soothing in DBT as a way to tolerate distress without making things worse.  The article discusses recent research showing that touching something warm (like a cup of coffee) after feeling rejected can help module our emotions.

This Week in Adolescent and Family DBT Group

This week in Adolescent and Family DBT group, we reviewed Self-Soothing and taught IMPROVE the Moment.  IMPROVE the moment stands for using Imagery (imagining relaxing scenes), Meaning (finding some meaning in the pain), Prayer (opening your heart to a supreme being), Relaxation (relaxing your muscles), One thing in the moment (focusing your entire attention on what you are doing right now), take a brief Vacation (taking a quick break from a difficult situation), and Encouragement (cheerleading yourself).  The homework is to practice using one IMPROVE the moment skill during the week when you feel negative emotions.

This week in Adult DBT Group

This week in Adult DBT Group we began the Mindfulness module and taught the Three States of Mind (Emotion mind, Reasonable mind, and Wise mind).  Emotion mind is when our emotions guide our thoughts and actions; we tend to ignore problem solving, logic, and possible consequences.  Reasonable mind occurs when we focus on just the facts and ignore our emotions.  Wise mind combines the other two states of mind; it involves "hitting the pause button" and incorporates both emotion and reason.  Wise mind occurs when you know something to be true or valid deep down inside of you.  Each of our wise minds may be different.  When we act based on our wise mind, we make decisions that we still feel good about down the road.  

Mindfulness Quote of the Week

"The only man who never makes a mistake is the man who never does anything."  -Theodore Roosevelt